I hate to complain, because I know there are others that suffer greater that I do. And I know there are other side effects I could be having, but I am not, like mouth sores.
But that being said, there are two things that are kinda driving me nuts.
First is called chemo brain or mental fogginess.
When I heard about this in chemo class, before starting chemo, I thought it sounded ridiculous. Boy was I wrong!
Its like pregnancy or mom brain times 10.
I have difficulty concentrating or staying focused on a task. Trouble remembering words, names, dates. No ability to multi-task even function sometimes.
Thus the reason if any of these posts don't make sense, it's because I forgot to ask my friend Denise or my sister Paula fix all my grammatical and spelling errors before posting my craziness to the world.
A few days ago, I was doing the laundry to find I had once again ran the washing machine without putting clothes in it.
Stood there and laughed, and thought "Next year this is time I'll be back to normal , with a somewhat healthy body that has energy, and an average functioning brain."
I'm realistic, I wasn't that great before this process started. But this body and this brain is driving me crazy.
Second is the neuropathy in my hands and feet.
They are constantly cold, numb, tingling, and burning, which causes pain. I also have the tendency to drop things.
At nights, I rub my feet and hands together to try and get feeling back. I also find myself scratching the pads of my fingers on my knee, just like my Grandma Lena did when she was 90 sitting in her recliner. She probable had the same problem, or it was a nervous twist.
Speaking of Grandma Hatch, last week while my dad was here, I was laying on the sofa and he was sitting across from me and he said to me, "Baby, you know who you look like?"
Me, before dad can respond, "Grandpa Vern"
My dad laughed and said, "Yes"
I told him I think that every time I look at myself in the mirror. My pointy nose, short gray buzz cut hair, and pale face, I look just like him.
So for those of you who knew Grandpa Vern, you now have a visual of what I look like going through chemo.
You would think I would be upset by this fact, but I'm not. I'm actually
quite proud to look like a Hatch.
I don't know if you'd call Grandpa Vern handsome but he was a great man. One of my favorite from my childhood.
But that being said, there are two things that are kinda driving me nuts.
First is called chemo brain or mental fogginess.
When I heard about this in chemo class, before starting chemo, I thought it sounded ridiculous. Boy was I wrong!
Its like pregnancy or mom brain times 10.
I have difficulty concentrating or staying focused on a task. Trouble remembering words, names, dates. No ability to multi-task even function sometimes.
Thus the reason if any of these posts don't make sense, it's because I forgot to ask my friend Denise or my sister Paula fix all my grammatical and spelling errors before posting my craziness to the world.
A few days ago, I was doing the laundry to find I had once again ran the washing machine without putting clothes in it.
Stood there and laughed, and thought "Next year this is time I'll be back to normal , with a somewhat healthy body that has energy, and an average functioning brain."
I'm realistic, I wasn't that great before this process started. But this body and this brain is driving me crazy.
Second is the neuropathy in my hands and feet.
They are constantly cold, numb, tingling, and burning, which causes pain. I also have the tendency to drop things.
At nights, I rub my feet and hands together to try and get feeling back. I also find myself scratching the pads of my fingers on my knee, just like my Grandma Lena did when she was 90 sitting in her recliner. She probable had the same problem, or it was a nervous twist.
Speaking of Grandma Hatch, last week while my dad was here, I was laying on the sofa and he was sitting across from me and he said to me, "Baby, you know who you look like?"
Me, before dad can respond, "Grandpa Vern"
My dad laughed and said, "Yes"
I told him I think that every time I look at myself in the mirror. My pointy nose, short gray buzz cut hair, and pale face, I look just like him.
So for those of you who knew Grandpa Vern, you now have a visual of what I look like going through chemo.
You would think I would be upset by this fact, but I'm not. I'm actually
quite proud to look like a Hatch.
I don't know if you'd call Grandpa Vern handsome but he was a great man. One of my favorite from my childhood.
As smart as you are Tamee… even your fog brain is still 10x better than most of us! Be thankful you are one smart cookie! :) Good luck with the next round of chemo. Always in our prayers and temple prayer roll.
ReplyDeleteThat last one was from Tammy, haha. Not Greg. :)
ReplyDeleteStill praying for you Tamee. Hope we can meet up again soon. Bethany
ReplyDeleteI don't know what grandpa Hatch looks like but to me you could never be anything but beautiful! We love you and pray for the whole family. Josh has chemo fog and it is ok, he likes being able to forget to do his chores. Love you, Ruth
ReplyDeleteI agree with Ruth and Tammy, you are smart and beautiful lady!!! You have such a great attitude. Even in my own silly day to day frustrations I have to remind myself, "It's only temporary."
ReplyDeleteEasier said than done for sure!
Hang in there!