My Inspiration

My Inspiration

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

I am stronger than cancer...

During one of my past stays in the hospital I went through a change of thought or maybe a better understanding.

I've never really thought of myself as "fighting" cancer.
Maybe because its not really in my nature to be aggressive, violent or angry toward anything.
I don't like conflict.
Ask anyone who has ever been to a violent or even action filled movie with me, I'm a mess because it makes me really uncomfortable and I can't watch.
Also I don't think of myself as being a strong person, who could fight a real battle.

But what I've learned is that when someone is struggling with anything, they fight it on three fronts, physical, spiritual, and mental.

I have a good friend, Jen Roper, who is my age, and has 5 small children that are almost the same ages as mine.  She lost her mother to breast cancer at a young age, and has been fighting off brain cancer for the past two years.  And winning..
She's so strong physically.  She's changed all her eating habits, and runs races every other month.
She's a spiritual giant.  Through all her trials, she has faith and understanding that God loves and has a plan for her and her sweet little family.
But what always amazes me is her mental confidence and determination.  She ends most of her posts with "I AM STRONGER THAN CANCER".  And doggone it, she is.  She just got another clear MRI.
I admire her strength on all fronts, and strive to be courageous like her, even though my battle is nothing in comparison to hers.
Ever need to be inspired read her blog www.theroperfam.blogspot.com

During my last stay in my hospital, I had a moment when this way of thinking all changed.
After six months of sickness, for some reason this one day was the last straw.
I started the day from a dead sleep, throwing up with no relief even with intense IV medicine, the pain and vomiting would not cess.
As the day continued the throwing up was accompanied by diarrhea.  At one point I was in the bathroom with a mess everywhere, I broke down into tears.
One of my favorite nurses at the hospital, Jackie (who is 7 months pregnant with her first baby) stood next to me, trying to help and comfort me, and it hit me.
I HATE CANCER!
If it was a thing or a person, and in the room at that moment, I would use all the strength left in me to beat the crap out of it.
An even though I feel weak physically now, I can and am stronger spiritually and mentally.
I am stronger than cancer and all the other side effects that have come with fighting cancer.

I hate what fighting cancer has detained me from doing, which is caring for my kids, husband, home, family and friends.  
But it has forced me and my family to see things in a new light and appreciate the little things.

A few months ago I was frustrated and complaining about how little I've been able to do to help out with the care and school work of my own children.
A good wise friend, sent me a text to remind me that I've been teaching them more important lessons about life.
I can do hard things.
And doing hard things forces me to grow.

6 comments:

  1. Love you Tamee and prayers for you! While your friend may be your champion - you are such an amazing lady - championing for life, love, and future! You inspire me! Praying! XO <3

    ReplyDelete
  2. Tamee you are a 'go getter' now! You were thrown into the ring. You are a survivor girl. SO proud of the person you are. Hugs Trish May

    ReplyDelete
  3. Love this post and the sweet words about Jen - You are the Jen in someone elses life! This will be only a memory before long. Love you and your sweet family so much.

    ReplyDelete
  4. It's so difficult to watch you having to fight this battle which is in so many ways a personal fight and one which those of us who love you so much can do little more than stand on the sidelines and watch. I would so much like to be able to do more than pray and cry and worry, but I am so proud of the magnificent way you have faced and fought this monster. I know you will win and know as well that God will bear you up. I love you darling..

    ReplyDelete
  5. We love you, Tamee, you are an inspiration!! From Jeff and Wendy Bushman

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ahh, ditto to the fine words from Paul Hatch. Wish I could do more than pray and sit here and cry at my computer (which I have spent hours doing)…..but I'm so glad you're winning and are stronger than cancer. LOVE YOU!

    ReplyDelete